October 25, 2006, 6:00pm

My counselor said I'm always controlling my emotions. So, the way to do is to release my emotions. Far too often I'm holding back my sadness... And I'm scared about feeling emotions.

I don't want to lose control of my emotions. I have the fear that I will be crazy if I don't hold back my sadness. I don't want to be like my mother, to be simply uncontrollable. I also don't want to be sad, then I may be mean to others.

But my counselor said I won't be like my mother. I'm not her. So, my task this week is to feel my sadness... This is really difficult. I usually find ways to make myself happy when I'm sad.

I will try to do it anyways.